No, instead,
Tesla (TSLA) is selling on its website a branded pair of red, satin
short shorts — a jab at investors who “shorted” the company, essentially betting on its stock falling.
Unfortunately for any readers who would have been willing to shell out $69.420 (yes, really) for a pair of tiny Tesla gym shorts, they’re already sold out. Apparently they went fast: Soon after announcing the shorts were on sale, Musk
tweeted, “Dang, we broke the website.”
“Tesla will make fabulous short shorts in radiant red satin with gold trim,” Musk
tweeted last week, hinting at the new merch. “Will send some to the Shortseller Enrichment Commission to comfort them through these difficult times.”
In typical Musk fashion, that tweet came shortly before
another off-color quip apparently also aimed at his doubters and the Securities and Exchange Commission: “SEC, three letter acronym, middle word is Elon’s.”
Just last year, Tesla was
strapped for cash. In May 2019, the electric carmaker was
selling debt and additional shares of stock to raise $2.7 billion to replenish its coffers. A depressed share price forced the company to pay off a $920 million bond in cash rather than stock. In its ten-year history, the company had only posted a handful of quarterly profits.
But in January, the company
posted its first-ever annual profit — and the company’s positive momentum has continued from there.
Despite interruptions from the coronavirus pandemic — including stay-at-home orders
which Musk referred to as “fascist” — Tesla last week posted
relatively strong car delivery numbers for the second quarter of the year.
The company delivered 90,650 cars to customers during the quarter, down 5% from a year ago, but far less than the drops of 30% or more reported by other automakers. Tesla’s second-quarter sales were also up a bit from the 88,400 cars it delivered in the first quarter.
The cars are celebrated on the new Tesla shorts. The rear of the shorts features each of the Tesla model numbers, “S3XY,” emblazoned in gold lettering.
According to Tesla, the shorts will provide “exceptional comfort from the closing bell.”
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